Early January a struggle?

There are two camps of people that get hit with January blues.

Those affected early January and those more likely to be affected end of January. Here’s why you may find yourself in either camp and 5 things that help:

Early January

It’s all about dopamine, weather, and change of pace.

Coming off the 6 week manic high of the holiday sprint filled with sugary boozy bliss (and possibly an intense end of year sales quarter), the brain is revved up and used to more dopamine and depletion than normal. It’s largely in survival mode, distracted by purpose and hustle.

Holiday travel, parties to attend, cards to put out, deals to close, events to host, presents to wrap, and booze to cheers elevates brain reward chemicals and stress hormones for an inevitable crash.

Come January, the weather has been cold and Vitamin D deficient for almost 2 months, but the time sensitive distractions have now waned. Overnight, the ‘most wonderful time of the year’ celebrations turn to ‘New Year, New You’ extreme discipline- but the weather is still uninspiring and cold.

Dance on tables New Years night, hit the ground running (literally) New Year’s day. It’s quite the bipolar turn around. Consequently, some of us struggle with this brain chemistry pivot.

End of January

If your industry conference schedule includes the JP Morgan conference in SF, CES in Vegas, or DAVOS in Switzerland, you likely won’t feel the dopamine pull back until late January as you’re still in the chaotic throws of non stop happy hours and needing to be ‘ON.’

No matter when the gray fog of January hits with its judgy drill sergeant sidekick, you’re not alone, and these can help:

1. Pick a 2 week buffer

Whenever your sprint is scheduled to slow, pencil in 1 week of no social obligations to catch your breath and re-acclimate.

Organize the office, plan your quarter, look at exercise class schedules, and get more sleep. If you’re an over achiever, possibly dip your toes in a mild exercise and meditation attempt and slow the recent fun crutches the body has gotten used to imbibing (sugar & booze).

2. keep self compassion top of mind

Think of the first 2 weeks of your New Year as a detox, slow down period. Add in more veggies, stretch, take a moment to reflect on what you did right last year. Lots of kudos, celebration, and gratitude for the blessings and accomplishments. Chocolate chip cookies & wine can still be on the menu as your body adjusts but more veggies take center stage.

Hold space for the brain to withdraw from the manic pace it’s grown accustomed. It’s a good time to consider more sleep, massages, bone broth, and setting up the body for a detox or fast - just not abruptly.

Doubling the lemon water gets bonus points.

This is not the time for a slammed to do list or unrealistic, punishing fitness goals. It’s cold outside, the body is in hibernation mode, and it’s dry. An hour involving the jacuzzi/sauna with some stretching/dancing, ending with a blanket by the fire is perfect.

No need to dust off the running shoes quite yet if they’ve been sleeping for 2 months. Re-stabilize your core and joints and stretch before hitting the sprints.

3. Double the Vitamin D & B and consider happy lights.

If you struggle during the winter with seasonal affective disorder (SAD), head to vitamin D -ASAP. I take medical grade 50,000 IU of Vitamin D per week during the winter. You’ll notice more tanning beds in Seattle and Portland - and there’s a reason. They also sell bright happy lights for your desk or bedside table to mimic warmer months.

With the downshift in daylight and sunshine, SAD symptoms may require more fun cardio movement for endorphins, long hugs with friends for oxytocin, and gratitude lists for perspective to keep happy chemicals flowing

4. Have the reboot plan -and permission slip for it- ready.

When Dopamine pulls back and immediate purpose isn’t forcing us to show up, downshifting to a new pace can be literally painful. Knowing it’s coming helps, but having the permission slip in your pocket may be necessary.

Something like, “Even though this feels weird and lacks the exuberance of the holiday grind, this is the right way to spend my time and sets me up for a happy year and healthy mind/body. I have permission to transition.”

Anyone with early trauma, anxiety, depression, or addiction tendencies will especially benefit from this external permission reminding the brain it’s ok to rest and recalibrate as it inevitably searches for stimulation.

5. Keep perspective

People really don’t expect much of each other during January and even February. However you spend it is the right way. No one is keeping track of whether you’re perfect with your resolutions or ‘hit the ground running’ in “your best year yet.”

In fact many are right there with you recalibrating. Dry January, detox, and Whole30 attempts often affect social schedules. SAD affects many moods and energy levels. People disappear to focus on work or escape to snowy destinations to ski.

It’s the perfect time to take care of you and celebrate what’s already been accomplished.

9 things to know about Narcissists

Narcissists can make you feel crazy. Before you have tools to identify and understand them, you can fall prey to their unaware antics ~ especially if you were raised by one and subconsciously seek them out.

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Here are 9 things to help you recognize, protect against, and have compassion for this personality disorder:

1. They often don’t know they have it.

Narcissists really can’t hear you and truly don’t think it’s them. The idea that they are always right is so needed and their ego so fragile, it’s too damaging to hear anything to the counter.

2. They will always find a way to make it about them.

Conversations circle back to them. Only their feelings matter. While they struggle to feel empathy for another’s plight, they get offended and possibly punishing should you not see the severity of their circumstance. Their agenda, no matter how damaging to your world, are all they can see.

3. They justify whatever is best for them

Narcissists make most of their decisions based on how they feel about something. If they’re bored or depressed, they want to move or end the relationship or start a new business. They look to something or someone outside themselves to solve their feelings and needs. They expect you to go along with their “solutions,” and they react with irritation and resentment if you don’t.

4. They feel very alone and can’t connect

Because of their lack of empathy, and constant need for self-protection, narcissists can’t truly love or connect emotionally with other people. They cannot look at the world from anyone else’s perspective. This makes them emotionally needy.

When one relationship is no longer satisfying, they often overlap relationships or start a new one as soon as possible. They desperately want someone to feel their pain while having little ability to respond to other’s pain or fear.

5. They are terrified of not being enough

Their brain has created this coping mechanism of delusions of grandeur that can be quite dangerous to dispute. Because they need this image of themselves to feel real, anyone that disputes their over inflated self should duck. They have no sense of humor when the joke is on them.

6. They can be quite charming

They are tap dancing for their survival and they need your positive mirroring of their self image to continue on. This makes them quite motivated to gather the likable skills necessary. They know to offer you something as they reach out with an ulterior agenda.

7. There are varying degrees of Narcissism

One can have narcissistic tendencies or have a full blown disorder. I rank it based on the inclination to make it about themselves and the degree of delusion.

If they only keep people around that are their clapping audience and can’t see why one would ever choose what is best for everyone if it conflicts with what is best for them, you’re likely dealing with a narcissist. They can’t fathom anything being more important than their needs.

Trauma can spark a pain-based self absorption in otherwise good people. This is almost it’s own category. This one I call ‘pain-based narcissism’ and I believe it can be reversed depending on how severe and how long ago the trauma happened.

8. Trigger a Narcissist and get ready to apologize

…and swear to never do it again. Be ready to feel like you’re talking to a wall that quickly gets defensive and angry. Full blown Narcissists don’t have a concrete sense of self and usually can’t self soothe well so if you’ve accidentally triggered their protection system, fix it ASAP and release expectations they’ll apologize. They will only escalate the fight and crucify you for daring to bring up the idea of their imperfection.

9. Confront a Narcissist and expect to get ‘Gas Lit’

Gas Lighting is a maddening tactic that turns any fight on their adversary into a way they can win at all costs. It’s called “gas lighting” and truth need not apply. It’s about winning, not reconciling and the facts are not important. Manipulation and bullying tools get employed to throw you off. We’re have a very public political example to study.

They’ll yell louder and bring up non relevant damning details to try to throw you off the main point. You’ll feel like you’re going crazy and your nervous system will be assaulted and wildly triggered. If you’re looking through a healthy lens, you may make the mistake of trying to include fairness or logic to the equation.

This is a mental illness and normal paradigms do not apply. Gas lighting is quite damaging and can undermine your view of reality so get away from a Narcissist that does this if you can.

We also, unfortunately, have a greater chance of developing tendencies ourselves if we were raised by a Narcissist. Self awareness of your tendencies is a great way to know you’re not a full blown Narcissist.

Narcissists have a protective mechanism that keeps them from acknowledging any personal flaws. It’s too painful for them. If you can actually see your self absorbed tendencies, you have a real shot at healing them.

This sugar baby survived a 2 week cleanse

Two weeks into my blended raw veggie, superfood cleanse and…

1.     EVERYDAY WORKS:

Everything in my closet fits and daily life is easier. My thoughts are clearer, anxiety largely gone, reactions are better, and mood is balanced.

There’s no random bloating, intense cravings, evening cramping, IBS, or constipation. There’s no time taken out to recover from odd meals, sugar spikes, or toxins from the night before.

I don't fear the dark corners of my mind as toxins spike my chronic inflammation, steal B vitamins and magnesium, and leave me without a mental life preserver when stress happens. 

I hadn’t anticipated the 'life is just easier' benefit of this Vitalist cleanse.

2.     I NOTICE MY RELATIONSHIP WITH FOOD 

With my cells being fed and blood sugar balanced, I’m not actually hungry. BUT I still very much crave sugar to get me through dull moments and distract with a high. The lack of option is liberating and over time the cravings went down.

It’s nice to have the decision already made, to just feel the urge and notice it without struggling with whether or not to cave to it. My brain slowed down it's ADD search for sugary escape once it knew it wasn't an option. I enjoyed more natural focus.

3.     I'M LEARNING BALANCE 

After doing the first week by the book, I detected a craving from my body for animal protein. I had been on the easy to digest, raw, vegan, masterfully combined superfood blends. I had done the herbs, the castor packs, the tummy massages, the oil drinking, the rest, and even the dreaded coffee enema. It all felt medically good for cleanse purposes but not necessarily perfect for my body chemistry daily.

So I played with balance. I promised myself I'd focus on the wins.

I celebrated my exhibition of more discipline than I thought possible for my rebellious, impulsive, use-sugar-as-a-drug spirit.

Off alcohol and sugar the last month+ to prep and build slowly, I was able to celebrate how big of a deal that was and allow modifications the second week with total self love.

After the big liver and gallbladder flush, I observed a rebellion against the 5x/day herbs. I wanted to sneak in a deviled egg or cooked soup stripped of its original enzymes. I wanted spice intensive, flavorful, sugary curry.

And so 2nd week, I allowed myself, and I watched.

A bit of bloat creeped back in with harder to digest choices and less fluids but I retained a desire to continue mostly blended superfoods 70% of the time for ease and comfort.

I felt a welling pride that I was shifting my flexibility around previous all or nothing thinking and could hear my body's preferences.  I knew I could go back to 5 days of herbs and all blended before the next liver flush and really appreciated the ease these food combinations were bringing to my life.

I liked having the blueprint AND noticing where my wiggle room was on the spectrum. I was celebrating wins instead of counting personal errors.

Halle-friggin-lujah!

I love that my food spectrum no longer includes slurpees, ice cream snickers bars, or cheetos. Sugar and starchy processed carbs are my Achilles heel. Others may struggle with dairy or meat, but I really get worked over by blood sugar spikes.

A recent habitnutrition.com blood test had confirmed what I already intuitively knew: I had sensitive pancreatic cells struggling to release insulin so often. I am prone to diabetes if I eat common sugary desserts – even more so as my activity level downshifts with age.

Plus, like many people, I have chronic inflammation from fast living and high toxin exposure compounded with intense internal dialogue ~ {I suspect originating from early trauma and attempts to system override to prove worth through "productivity."} My already high cortisol levels don't need sugar's 'helpful boost' and the path I was on is ripe for an autoimmune disease.

Even knowing about inflammation's damage, I feared letting go of my sugary security blanket and frankly doubted I could. I had asked the universe for a done for me, easy, delicious way to break my patterning. And doing this first step FEELS HUGE! :)

I know I don't really have the luxury to continue to treat food like an escapist drug rather than information for my cells so I'm super grateful these blended drinks weren't gross. I had to find a better coping mechanism than sugar and the delicious Vitalist superfood blends made exploring this transition possible. The chocolate chia protein powder nut milk blend mimics a cold chocolate mousse and got me through cravings.

The Takeaway 

Experimenting with truly balanced blood sugar for 2 weeks has been such a gift. Having clearer thoughts, needing less sleep, feeling lighter in my body, enjoying a svelte physique, and reducing decision fatigue in the food arena has been great. I suspect the aloe in my favorite 'Aloe Detox' blended drink has also helped repair leaky gut damages to my intestinal walls. That drink will forever be found in my fridge.

Pretty excited to be past the all liquid part so I can get back to the Unicorn nutballs and the nut cheese, jalapeno chip Nachos. I love food and want to feel good and sometimes that's a tough balance for this sugar baby.

3 things that help a depressive episode.

Send Depression Book

Depression Book

Depression is an illusive enemy coming on when we least expect it.

It's never the right time and not knowing how long the episode will last is terrifying. Ideas of productivity go out the window as our purpose, worthiness, future happiness, and ability to focus get questioned by the internal minute.

Here are 3 things that I've found really help drag me into the light with some forced perspective when my brain starts turning left.

 

1. Get Outside to connect with community / phone a friend

The last thing you'll want to do is often the best thing to shatter the lies spreading through the narrowing walls of your mind. Walking in the sunshine to a coffee shop and being super kind to the cashier, smiling at a stranger, or spreading compliments does an unexpected perspective shift.

The addition of people / fresh air / sunshine / new views (external variables) that likely need your kindness, injects a small sense of community, mass vulnerability, and sense of worth. That person whose child you complimented probably needed to hear they are doing ok as a parent. The cashier you tipped and thanked is likely still stuck on the last guy who took out his frustration on her.

Your input and positive vibes matter and you'll see it on the world around you - if you just get outside and put on your best happy actor face for others' benefit. This is tough if the shame cycle has already kicked in making you want to hide from everyone. I promise, they don't see what you see at this moment and will love the positive moment with you.

If you can't get outside, phone a friend. Rather than share what is bugging you, tell them how much you appreciate them and their friendship. Glow about their positive attributes and how much they mean to you. Joke about the impending cheesiness and then lay it on thick.

Depression loves to bring other people down with it while making us feel fearful that others wont like us once they see our darkness. It gets us coming and going. Rather than play it's game, just spread light and hang up. You'll feel the other person's boost and it.will.feel.awesome. It will also remind you of the impact you have in others lives. The world will look a bit sunnier for a second.

 

2. High Intensity Movement & Water!

Endorphins, Oxygen, & Opiates ...mmmmmmmmm. Changing our biology often kick starts brain boosting self confidence, a sense of worth, and overall feel good. It doesn't have to be kick ass or super long. 5-7 minutes of no break squats, cardio, yoga, weight lifting, or dancing gets the blood flowing, the breaths deeper, and calms the brain. AND moving blood, flushing your system with water, and shaking the lymphatic system helps detox. Toxins can definitely be a triggering source of a depressive episode. Dehydration is the 3rd leading cause of depression so water is a double threat against the dark D-bag.

 If you're under the weather or super fatigued, consider sitting in a sweaty sauna, getting a massage, or stretching to change your biology. The endorphins may be absent but the detox properties, oxygen, focus on the present, and opiates will help. A brilliant friend who has similar brain chemistry reminded me that cold showers/cold water is proven to jolt the mind out of depression. "I smile and get fired up everyday I turn off the hot water at the end of my shower."

 

3. Practice Permission, credit, & Gratitude

Got a brain that won't budge after you've tried the above two? Maybe your brain is signaling it's time to rest and reboot. Let's take stock of what you've ALREADY done for work, friends, family, home organization, planning, charity, health, or goals in the last week, month. Credit counts!

A Depression prone brain often has a default setting that goes back to fault finding and feelings of unsafe / unworthiness. So let's look at the data, not the lies of our mind. Even small stuff counts! You open email? Get out of bed? Look nice one of the days this week? Spread kindness to an animal, child, stranger, or friend? Show up when you said you would? Choose to eat something green? Awesome! Write it down.

 Then let's look at the natural blessings around. Is it a nice time of year for your favorite fruit? Weather decent? Got great hair? Have a friend you're grateful for? Small and large things we are blinded to when the depression filter kicks in are often quite substantial. But we can no longer see them as depression robs our joy and hides the goodness in our lives. I've found that when in doubt, showing up even when I don't feel like it really matters. It shifts perspective and builds momentum and pride. 

Fighting back against depression is maddening, difficult, and still important. As it makes the case for why you and your contribution are worthless, show up for life anyway - even spacey / lost / fuzzy headed / less articulate / joyless / unmotivated ... IT REALLY MATTERS. Every time you do show up, give yourself major kudos.

**Bonus tip**

IV nutrient therapy is the mood boosting game changer I turn too when I know my system is really off. For $200 (+$60 glutathione and selenium/zinc add ons), you can get your essential vitamin, minerals, and hydration put straight back into the vein. This bypasses any absorption issues or leaky gut your system may have. Noticeable mood boost, especially if this depressive episode was brought on by toxins or depletion. I like Dr Neetu at Dryp Studios.

Only those with these tripwire brains get how tough life is when the "why" disappears. I can not speak for your experience and welcome additional treatments that work for you. Let's figure this out together! 

Hit the button below to email me if you'd like a copy of the 56 page mini book I wrote on the many spokes on the depression wheel and some things we can do about it.

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GETHSH is a wellness blog dedicated to researching the variables in the formula to feeling good. All suggestions should be taken on your own free will after consulting your physician.

25 ways to be happier

Repost from InspitationsandCelebrations - check out #13 :)

25 Experts Tips on How To Be Happier

To celebrate the International Day of Happiness, today’s personal growth guide features 25 tips from happiness experts (including Psychologists, Counselors, Social Workers, Self-Help Authors, and Motivational Speakers) on how to be happier.

1. LOVE YOURSELF: “The best way to be really truly happy is to love yourself. External happiness will be brought into your life when at your core you are genuine in your thoughts, words, and actions. Embrace your strengths and accept or change your struggles.” – Kelley Kitley, LCSW is the owner and psychotherapist at Serendipitous Psychotherapy, LLC. in Chicago, Illinoi.

2. IMAGINE THINGS GOING RIGHT: “When everything is going wrong, explore the ideas of some things going right. Happiness is typically conditioned upon a state of being. People experiencing unpleasant phases of life can achieve happiness when they make the right things bigger. Make your happy bigger than your problems.” – Shannon Battle, LCAS, LPC, CSOTS is the Clinical Director of Family Services of America in Fayetteville, North Carolina.

3. END NEGATIVITY: “Reduce stress in your life by avoiding negative people and staying around positive people as much as possible. Stop watching the news or at least reduce your viewing as there is so much negativity in the news. Supplement with the anti-stress mineral, magnesium.” – Carolyn Dean, MD, ND is a stress management expert and nutrition expert, as well as the author of The Magnesium Miracle and The Complete Natural Medicine Guide to Women’s Health.

4. DO GOOD, FEEL GOOD: “Doing nice things for others has been research-proven to increase your happiness and boost your mood. Giving back to others can help you to take the focus off of yourself and your worries and can improve someone else’s day. Kindness and compassion are some of the most important things that we have to offer.” – Jennifer Rollin, MSW, LGSW is a Mental Health Therapist and Social Worker in North Potomac, Maryland.

5. WRITE IT DOWN: “Write down one thing (you) are grateful for every day. There is extensive research that supports the effectiveness of gratitude in making people feel happier, and the act of writing it down helps my clients develop a gratitude-habit which eventually becomes a way a viewing the world.” – Marie Levey-Pabst is the founder of Create Balance and a consultant who helps parents find balance and joy in their lives.

6. DO WHAT YOU WANT: “Do things that you want to do versus things you feel you should do. Should is guilt inducing and it drains our energy. When it’s a want, it empowers us.” – Jenn DeWall is a professional coach and motivational speaker in Denver, Colorado.

7. BE GRATEFUL: “Build a gratitude list, embrace progress over perfection, laugh at yourself, find your passion, and live with integrity.” – Richard London is a motivational speaker, author, and the owner of A Handbook for Life Center in Matthews, North Carolina.

8. VALIDATE OTHERS: “Validate others. This is simple and powerful. Throughout the day actively look to thank other people for their contributions; thank the grocery checker for a good job; thank a police officer for being out there for you; thank the paperboy. It’ll make their day and yours.” – Dr. John McGrail,  PhD, is a Los Angeles-based clinical hypnotherapist, self improvement expert and personal/relationship coach, as well as the author of The Synthesis Effect: Your Direct Path to Personal Power and Transformation.

9. FIND UPLIFTING PEOPLE: “There are many benefits to spending time with people who encourage, uplift, support and cheer for you, not against you, some of which include improved health, reduced stress and increased creativity. Lifters genuinely want to see you do well. They celebrate and encourage awesomeness which in turn allows you to find more awesomeness within yourself.” – Tammie Norn is a certified leadership speaker, trainer, and coach in Ontario, Canada.

10. TAKE A BREAK: “With the fast pace of our society and all the instant connection, it’s difficult to step back and take a breath. Schedule a 15-30 minute break to rest, unplug, and do absolutely nothing. Put this important meeting on your calendar and protect your time.” – Kanesha Baynard is a Life Coach and Author in San Francisco, California.

11. KNOW YOURSELF: “Watch for patterns in your life, and seek to understand why they are occurring. This allows you to capitalize on the great ones, and course correct on those that aren’t making your life better.” – Brian Brandt is a Motivational Speaker and the CEO of Core Insights in Tyler, Texas.

12. MAKE A SCHEDULE: “We should always know our goals and priorities. We have to schedule minimum time for each and ever part of life, (such as) career, family, personal time, and health. Just measure and monitor (your time), and you will have a good habit developed in no time.” – Shawn Chhabra is an Author and Podcast Host of “Winning The Game of Life Podcast” on WGL.FM in St. Louis, Missouri.

13. CELEBRATE YOUR WINS: “Count your accomplishments. We are bombarded with images of where we lack. Practicing celebrating all of our wins trains our brain to be less anxious, kinder to ourself, and (helps us) release rewarding brain chemicals.” – Sara Plummer Barnard is a relationship and happiness consultant who helps people get past their past and into their best selves.

14. BE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOURSELF: “You are responsible for your own happiness. Do not rely on others to make you happy. Create a life where you do things you enjoy, a life that brings you happiness.” – Dr. Raquel A. Stuart is an Author, Educator, and Radio Host as well as the Founder & CEO of Sistas Speak, LLC. in Willingboro, New Jersey.

15. RELEASE CONTROL: “Stop trying to control everything and just let it flow. Adopt this philosophy to your life. When something in your life goes wrong, just yell ‘plot twist’ and move on. Learning to let go of control, be flexible, and realize that the things you’re stressing about today really won’t matter tomorrow eliminates all of the worry and stress in your life, and allows more happiness and joy to come to you.” – Sherica A. Matthews is an Author, Life/Relationship Coach, and Speaker in Houston, Texas.

16. START THE DAY RIGHT: “How we start our day sets our mood for the day. We should wake early to be able to ease our way into the day. Have a cup of coffee, listen to a podcast, watch something you have been saving on your DVR. If you start your day calmly and in an enjoyable way, you set the tone for the rest of your day.” – Nicole Martinez, Psy.D., LCPC is a Psychologist and Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor.

17. EXERCISE: “Exercise frequently. Physical exercise increases endorphins and dopamine release which promotes happiness. If possible, spend some of this time outside. Sunlight increases the production of Vitamin D, which promotes a positive mood.” – Dr. Jared Heathman is a psychiatrist in Houston, Texas who is trained in child, adolescent, and adult psychiatry.

18. LET IT GO: “Don’t harbor ill-will or grudges. When we hold onto grudges, it only becomes our burden. Get rid of negativity. Look into things that make you feel less happy and eliminate those from your life. Pessimistic people, bad news, social media, etc. (Just) let it go.” – Joshua Evans is an enthusiasm expert, speaker, author, and mentor at Enthusiastic You! in Houston, Texas.

19. MEDITATE: “One of the easiest and simplest ways to be happier is to develop a daily meditation habit. It only takes a few minutes a day, but just by taking the time to sit up straight, close your eyes, and focus on your breathing, you can, over time, decrease your stress levels.” – John Turner is the CEO & Founder of QuietKit, which provides guided meditation for beginners (for free).

20. MAINTAIN HYGIENE: “When we are oscillating towards feelings of sadness, we tend to lay in bed for more hours than not; not shower; watch television all day. When we (do these things), we are not activating our bodies and this can further contribute to sadness. A refreshing shower has a positive impact on your mood and day. Therefore, the internal and external go hand-in-hand.” – Dr. Stephanie J. Wong is a Licensed Clinical Psychologist in Palo Alto, California who helps people that long to be connected to others, maintain sobriety, and feel accomplished.

21. CHANGE YOUR FOCUS: “What we focus on becomes our reality. When we adjust our focus to the good… we open up our ability to see more good and happy moments. Our brains notice what we consciously spend time on. Spend more time recognizing the good, (as) the positive and the uplifting stories allows us to be more aware of the positive and increase our level of happiness throughout the day.” – Cara Maksimow, LCSW, CPC is a Madison, New Jersey-based Licensed Clinical Social Worker, Life Coach, Motivational Speaker and Author of Lose That Mommy Guilt Tales and Tips from an Imperfect Mom.

22. TAKE ACTION: “Finding happiness requires action. If you are not feeling happy, you need to do something different. Start by asking yourself, ‘what in your life is keeping you from being happy?’ The action you need to take to find happiness comes from those feelings. Whatever you can do now to elicit those feelings is crucial to finding happiness.” – Loris Brant B.A., B.Ed. is the Author of The Happiness Toolbox: Finding Happiness Regardless of Circumstances (launching June 1, 2016), a  Teacher, Life Coach & Master Spirit Life Coach in Ontario, Canada.

23. ENJOY THE LITTLE THINGS: “Remember that our lives happen in singular, small moments. We can consciously make those small moments feel magical for ourselves and for others. All to often, we focus on big celebrations or future events we think will make us happy. But the truth is, when we get present to small moments and we do little things to brighten up those moments, our lives start to take on this technicolor feel.” – Sherry Richert Belul is the Founder of Simply Celebrate in San Francisco, California.

24. JUST SMILE: “Facial feedback works because the brain senses the flexion of certain facial muscles (like the zygomatic major, which is required to smile) and interprets it as “Oh I must be happy about something.” Similarly, if that muscle isn’t flexed then your brain thinks, “Oh, I must not be happy”. In addition to the direct neural feedback, in the real world you also get the added advantage of social feedback. Smiles are infectious (perhaps another post on mirror neurons in the future). So even if you don’t feel much happier, the people around you are more likely to smile, and that can improve your mood as well.” – Alex Korb, Ph.D. is a contributor to Psychology Today.

25. WEAR UPLIFTING COLORS: “Based on the study of Color Psychology, colors can have an effect on the way we feel. Invigorating colors (such as yellow and orange) tend to help us feel more upbeat, socially-inclined, and optimistic. On days when you need an extra boost of cheer, opt to wear a mood-elevating hue.” – Christina-Lauren Pollack is the Lifestyle Blogger behind Inspirations & Celebrations, as well as a contributing writer to Carmel Magazine, The Los Angeles Fashion Magazine, and the Huffington Post.

My personal supplement protocol

Focus. Energy. Clarity. Calm.

In pursuit of a brain that works and a mood that's happy, I've tried a ton of things.

My supplement cabinet is now filled with nutritional hacks for PMS relief, focus, mood boost, and hangover avoidance. I prefer trusted brands that have good sourcing and come recommended by friend and functional medicine superstar Dr. Stephanie Daniel. Her suggestion toward Julia Ross's book on amino acid therapy kept me off anti-depressants during a tough time. I am now convinced that one trigger for depression is a depleted brain.

When the nutrient suggestions started getting overwhelming, I created a graph to keep them organized. I color coded the supplements so I could see which colors/nutrients played a role in multiple benefits. Notice how green Omega3 is involved in everything.

Everyday I make sure to get my Bs, Cs, Ds, Omega3s, minerals, and amino acids. Here's why:

Amino Acids are building blocks that help make our skinny/pretty/happy hormones and brain chemicals. B vitamins pull double duty in the body!! They are the mechanics that help convert these building blocks into hormones and are also the soldiers that buffer against stress. If we're stressed, we often don't have enough Bs left over to make enough feel good chemicals. With that workload, we go through a lot of Bs and many of us require a converted "methylated" form. Vitamin B injections work well for many and I love them.

Vitamin D3 is the energy, happiness, thyroid function, appetite suppression, bone strength, and immune system 'super hormone' that most of us are low in. I like Vital Nutrients D for when I travel and an under the tongue spray for home.

Omega 3s are the good fat our brain craves. Mood and clear thinking are directly tied to Omega3 fatty acids present in the body. The aging brain needs even more.

Minerals are the cofactors that make sure the important reaction in the body take place. Magnesium, the calming mineral that is crucial in the brain is involved with over 300 chemical processes in the body!

Probiotics are the good gut bacteria linked to happy mood, manageable waistline, and possibly everything else! Fiber feeds our good bacteria, sugar feeds the bad bacteria, and probiotics refill the ranks giving us more of the good. Helpful if our partying lifestyle, stress, or antibiotics have killed off our good guys. Below are the daily 5 I take.

I start my morning with a ton of lemon water to flush my organs and get my adrenal, immune, and skin supporting Vitamin C.  I take my brain and mood supporting amino acids on an empty stomach. If I want extra focus, I'll take a Neurothera or a NooTroo nootropic. If it's a tea/coffee day, I like the bullet proof executive style of blending nutrient rich grass fed butter into my tea for delicious brain food.

After a couple of hours of fasted work time and flushing of my system, it's time for a protein rich meal with eggs or salmon. Here is where I take the fat soluble supplements like B, D, and Omega 3 that absorb best in the presence of fat. 

If the work morning has left me anxious, I'll take a calming NeuroCalm filled with Taurine, GABA, Magnesium, and L-Theanine.

Because my stress hormone cortisol is unfortunately high, I also take a daily adaptagen formula that builds back my buffers giving me more stress resilience. I wrote the FreeTheFat weight loss program around this product after seeing stress' connection to stubborn weight retention.

The desire to feel focused but calm while lowering both my inflammation and cortisol inspired the CALM HAPPY FOCUSED bundled. Neurothera is the addition here with it's cognitive amino acids and mood boosting herbs.

The rest of the bundles are found on the supplements page and shown below.

Notice that the same 5 supplements are put into different combinations for desired mood effect. These are my favorite addon to my daily essential 5. I like the CALM HAPPY FOCUSED 4 pack -which is the same as buying Calm Pack + Happy Pack (but cheaper when bought together). Not until I venture out of mood / stress  and into beauty / hangover helper do new supplements emerge from the antioxidant family.

If I've been partying alot, I take the 3 antioxidant rich blends found in the BEAUTY BLEND. The hair/skin nails for beauty, antioxidant formula for anti-aging and the liver detox to support my liver.

If I'm running low in general, I'll restock with the biggest bundle THE WORKS that comes with wonderful digestive enzymes to get the most out of my food and free radical destroying antioxidants to help with aging and hangovers. This has the highest overall savings but still feels like a huge sticker shock even though I can do the math logically.

And finally, my super secret for when I'm truly depleted: IV therapy. 

Dr. Ahluwalia of Dryp.com has locations all over the bay. At $200-$300 a pop it gets pricey but man does it work to put you back in the game. I love the master antioxidant Glutathione add on!! Come flu season, opt for the extra zinc and selenium.

Love to hear your tips and tricks!

Here are a few other helpful graphs I put together along this journey to feel good.

Amino Acids and their Benefit:

Nutrient Benefits

Always open to new nutrient suggestions, leave yours in the comments below.

This one change helped me start the New Year svelte.

This was the first holiday season I found myself without alcohol. Managing family holidays with out vodka soda is something I would NEVER normally recommend. Your sanity is essential after all & most of our families keep the fun in disFUNctional. 

Here's how I found myself sober through the season and the awesome result come January 1st 2016!

Dec 15th LA Work Event

This year, on a mid-December trip to LA, I got the annual sinus infection. Lots of exercise, little sleep, colder weather combined with Halloween > Bermuda > overindulging at Thanksgiving and I wasn't exactly shocked my immune system gave me the bird. 

It started with a headache and by end of week had turned into a punishing ear infection.

Now, ice pick to-the-ear pain is usually something I hop on antibiotics for --- but I've been doing the whole probiotics, bone broth, L-Glutamine thing to build back my good gut bacteria. And antibiotics would negate much, if not ALL of my progress.

Like most, I have leaky gut- a dangerous separation of the intestinal wall cells. This single cell barrier on the intestinal wall is what helps absorb nutrients through the gut lining and keeps toxins and food particles from seeping into the rest of our system. Inflammatory immune system reactions and food allergies pop up when food particles & toxins seep through this barrier. My favorite foods could possibly make me sick moving forward - not ok. Gotta seal that gap.

I was scared & grossed out enough to lower my toxins and commit to resealing the bonds between these gut lining cells. The immune system related illnesses like Rheumatoid arthritis and thyroid problems are becoming unfortunately common in modern day culture & my joints have gotten really achy as I push my body to the limit with my high inflammation lifestyle. 

Another fun celebratory December tradition:  boozy, blissful, all you can eat Guardsman charity Crab Feed 

When I say "committed," I don't mean I was ready to give up alcohol or even sugar for that matter. Two huge inflammation offenders I rely on as lifestyle coping mechanisms. I was starting with the good probiotics in and decided to worry about getting the bad food out later. I know I know, both are necessary...

Santa Con San Francisco- 2016

LA Family Holiday Celebration

But this damn ear infection and my refusal to go on antibiotics made for a hard new reality. Processed foods, sugar, and alcohol had to beat it during the most sugar filled, drunk part of the year. To get my immune system strong enough to kick this bugger, I had to hydrate and sleep a whole lot more while ditching the weakening toxins. Waaaaa!?

My alcohol-fueled holiday cheer marathon was getting majorly f'd with. Could I do it?

If I wasn't being reminded hourly by a friendly stab to the side of the head, there's not a chance I would have made it. Spiked egg nog & hot toddies are too delicious. Without pain pounding me into submission, I likely wouldn't have stayed strong. I also married into a particularly fun family who know what to do with a dance floor & our friend group of stylish, event planning, marketing mavens make for a non stop party.

I was in big trouble.

However, holiday party 7 came and went & outside of a faked shot of vodka at a fun fam white elephant, I managed to go without alcohol hitting my lips.

Then New Year's in Tahoe approached and thanks to the cold, dry 10 degree weather and the occassional ear stabs,  being further dehydrated and dry did not appeal. I managed to stay sober even on the costumed dance floor. I was starting to feel invincible. Maybe I could release my attachment to a favorite coping mechanism after all. Even if I didn't really have a choice, and shouldn't be overly patting my own back, this was real progress! What a fun realization and a confidence boost of the possibilities! 

Here's what I noticed come Jan 1st, 13 days after kicking booze:

*My skin is clearer, tighter, and I'm way less bloated / puffy. I'm sure the sleep & extra hydration along with ditching alcohols dehydrating side effects were a power combo.

* I'm noticeably leaner. Starting the year with lean, toned thighs is not a resolution I set, but I'm bikini season ready mid winter!! This.Is.Incredible. I'm grabbing by bun / thigh crease in magical wonder. My credit card may be maxed out, but my body is not!

*I can see my abs- that helpful little cushioning layer is vacationing allowing for a flat tummy.

*I think clearer and have less fatigue. My mood is more even. Depression and brain fog are gone and I can handle stress with more grace. I'm not depleted and fumbling around for a sugar fix wondering which obscure amino acid or enzyme my body really needs. I don't feel crazy!

*I'm calmer and can focus better. With more rest and less stimulating sugar and alcohol pumped through my holiday month, I hit January with more dopamine receptors! This allows smaller tasks to be able to release the same brain chemical blitz of motivating goodness that usually requires more stimulation to achieve. 

*I'm motivated to keep it clean, green, & hydrated. Momentum is real and starting the New Year not feeling bloated & behind is just wonderful. This may be game changing enough to make Dec 15th my last drinking day of the year moving forward. I KNOW, CRAZY! I can't say enough good things about how different & empowering this year's start feels. 

WHAT A CHANGE FROM LAST YEAR'S BLOG POST!

i highly recommend taking 14 days of little sugar and no alcohol to reset your mind, mood, and waistline. Add in more sleep, more Lemon water, and 3/week sweat sessions in the sauna or spin bike for a heavy dose of feel good.

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YOU DESERVE TO FEEL GOOD!

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**GETHSH is a wellness blog dedicated to researching the variables in the formula for happiness & health. All suggestions should be reviewed with your licensed practitioner and taken on your own free will.